Chris - what makes us human?
sometimes i wish i was a machine,
nvr needing sleep, never running out of ideas,
juz churning out ideas every 2 seconds or so
that i didnt need to eat,
that i didnt need to sleep
that i wont get stressed,
that i have a engine instead of a heart
but maybe thats why we are human,
we are flawed, the flaws of being emotional,
angry, sad, tears, happiness, sleepiness, bad breath,
fats, gradual blindness due to overcomputing
that we curse and swear while in the front of the comp
ah well, this entry is half-assed..
later..
Chris - faith?
currently playing song : Start the Machine, Angels and Airwaves,
Photobooth, Death Cab for Cutie
i couldnt be bothered that no one has faith in me, i dun really care,
ah hell, who am i kidding, im not an self sufficient island, it does.. suck, that even my friends think i will fail my fyp, i can act like i dun care, but seriously, it sucks that even your friends have no hope in you too, lecturers i couldnt be bothered,
maybe being the life of a designer is lonely after all,
all glamor and skills-broadcasting,
but you may not really have friends after all,
but on the other hand, i have great friends,
and every friend is entitled to their doubts,
every friend is entitled to making speculations with too little evidence to back them up
real friends would be worried for you,
but its alright,
nothing else matters, other than end results
the process is what shape all of us,
but its the end results that decide our future,
im almost done, with my stuff to present tml,
its hectic, can be done, but hectic,
ah well, 2 more weeks,
and im starrting to really love 3d, its fun, simple,
when you want it to do something, you do it, and it works,
unlike coding, i still hate coding,
u can do everything right, but if one little LETTER or COMMA is out
totally screwed, so i'll take animation over coding anyday
on the other hand, i should have done a video FYP as well, might be easier,
lol..overnighting next week, again, in school, just to do animation
hardcore-ing animation tml, after interim
I remember when the days were long,
And the nights when the living room was on the lawn.
Constant quarreling, the childish fits, and our clothes in a pile on the ottoman.
All the slander and double-speak
Were only foolish attempts to show you did not mean
Anything but the blatant proof was your lips touching mine in the photobooth.
And as the summer's ending,
The cool air will put your hard heart away.
You were so condescending...
And this is all that's left:
Scraping paper to document.
I've packed a change of clothes and it's time to move on.
Cup your mouth to compress the sound,
Skinny dipping with the kids from a nearby town.
And everything that I said was true,
As the flashes blinded us in the photobooth.
Well, I lost track, and then those words were said.
You took the wheel and you steered us into my bed.
Soon we woke and I walked you home,
And it was pretty clear that it was hardly love.
And as the summer's ending,
The cool air will rush your hard heart away.
You were so condescending.
And this is all that's left:
Scraping paper to document.
I've packed a change of clothes and it's time to move on.
And as the summer's ending,
The cool air will rush your hard heart away.
You were so condescending,
As the alcohol drained the days.
And as the summer's ending,
The cool air will rush your hard heart away.
You were so condescending.
And this is all that's left:
The empty bottles, spent cigarettes.
So pack a change of clothes, 'cause it's time to move on.
//did all this start because of me?
Chris - the TRUE Cinderella story / The Cinderella Conspiracy
From the view of a Narrator,
Hello, I am the narrator, and I have been silenced to secrecy to the true events of the kids story Cinderella, but no more! I refuse to be silent any longer! The truth has to be out and it has to be out now! I can’t take it any more!
This is a story of what REALLY happened, before Cinderella went for the ball, when she got her glass slippers, and behind the scenes, to the exact emotions of Cinderella herself, and the horrors endured by her NARRATOR due to spoilt pampered kid’s storybook stars.
Once upon a time, there was a girl called Cinderella, she was due for the ball, but she had no clothes to wear, no nice fashionable shoes, so, the fairy godmother, being omnipotent-ly knowing and thoughtful, she provided her with some seriously expensive wardrobe and accessories, clothes from the medivial “Zara”, a carriage even, top of the line, fully air-conditioned and filled with vodka and mixers. But last of all, since shoes apparently made an impression then, GLASS slippers.
Cinderella : “Why glass slippers? They are so uncomfortable! I broke my toenail twice in those things you call “PROPS!” Couldn’t I have Birkenstocks instead? Wasn’t there something called padding at that time?!”
Narrator : “No! There wasn’t any Birkenstocks in those times! Glass slippers! Just wear them!”
Cinderella : “But I don’t want to! Couldn’t I just wear normal slippers?”
Narrator : “Outrageous! In medieval times, there weren’t any slippers! Their version of slippers was high-heeled shoes! Wear them and lets get on with the story!”
Cinderella being sulky-faced : “Butttttttt”
Narrator : “EH-BLEP!”
All things being said and done, with addition of some warnings being mentioned by the Fairy Godmother, she finally got going, complaining the whole of the journey about the slippers and ruining her make-up while at it. Finally, when the ball has just been rolling, the Fairy Godmother made some hurried repairs to Cinderella’s make up and kicked her out of the carriage.
At first being lost, then youths being how youths are, she went along with the crowd, and was swept away by the sheer glamorousness of it all. Her glass slippers, being made of tempered glass, crushed many a toe, piercing leather and steel shoe caps like tissue paper.
She caught the eye of the Prince, dazzled by her glass slippers and her beauty, note which one came first, and asked her out to dance. Surprisingly, he was fleet-footed, capable of even evading her heels, which was bombarding the floor, and quite possibly, cracking the tiles. She was lost in it all, the pain in her feet forgotten, while they participated in the exquisite art called the dance.
She saw her stepsisters, apparently trying very hard to dance, with drunken gentlemen who cannot tell, between the two and had no idea of the destination of their hands. With slaps that even be heard to the horsemen outside, the horsemen broke out laughing immediately, and went back to drinking rum with their horses.
But for Cinderella, even passion, the magic of the moment like all good things, all have to come to an end. And in her case, the throbbing pain caused by the glass slippers were making themselves known. Whispering so that only the narrator can hear and not her handsome date, which she gave sweet smiles to keep him in the dark how painful the price of beauty, really is.
Whispers Cinderella : I am going to kill you narrator! I am in the worse position possible! I am having the best day of my life and my feet are killing me!
But however the narrator chooses not listen, whistling happily, pretended ignorance is even sweeter bliss, especially when you have an uncooperative co-worker.
Suddenly, the clock starts to chime, and Cinderella freezes, her mind is nagging at her, telling her that she has something desperately important to take note of, screaming at her to remember, as if her life would depend on it.
In the nanoseconds of time which the mind operates, her small brain pulls up the information needed. In her head, the Fairy Godmother goes, “Since I know the youths today believe that partying clothes should only be worn outside once, and to be stowed in the cupboard for all eternity, I, thinking before you have a overflowing cupboard and considered you are a minor, your clothes have a magical expiry date, they will disappear off the skin of your body, at exactly 12 midnight! So you had better either be home by then or at least have a change of clothes nearby, or you will naked, in the ball, literally. And oh yes! Before I forget, the shoes wont go, because shoes can be reused in any situation, unlike clothes”
Time speeds up again for Cinderella, by this time, 3 chimes have rung, 9 chimes are left, before she is a public embarrassment. She looks at her date longingly and runs, like her life depends on it. Cursing the narrator, the Fairy Godmother and the storywriters all under her breath. She sprints down the stairs, stretching the dress to its limits! But who cares, its about to be gone anyway, alas! One of the glass slippers falls off, and Cinderella gasps, as she feels the freedom of one foot, and as her toes suck in as much oxygen as they can.
This is the part where it was unfairly omitted from the published story, what befell the fate of the other glass slipper? The truth is that, when she got to her stash of clothes, shoes, cash and emergency credit cards that was unceremonially stuffed into a hole in the tree, she took her uncomfortable glass slipper and hurled it into the swamp, such was the torture of the glass slipper.
The rest of the published story from this point on is true, except, when the Prince fitted the glass slipper on her foot again, in her mind, was not “happily ever after”, more accurately, it was “oh no, not again!”
Chris - thoughts
before we get told, before we get too old,
would you come with me and sing along with me?
maybe it was a day that you and I were just insane,
that everything else was just inane,
nothing else ever felt so right,
i hate sanity, i hate rationality, i hate regularity, i hate doubtablilty(i dun think thats a word)
just let me be insane for a little while more,
cuz my life has been tormenting for 19years
make me loved, make me whole, make me feel fall in a hole
a trash recepticle was my turning point in life,
the memories of beside it still has a place in my mind
i wanna make everything right, never ever commit a blight
taking a light, while its still night, just to cook something light
the oven is my best friend, the stuff i made was to make you smile
the reason i cook is to show without words, how much i dun wanna be a nerd.
//ignore me, mind is happily going nuts, too much work plus emo, cuz im alone at studio at FREAKING 1045!
im doomed
juz got the mail today, animation students have a interium presentation this coming monday, this leaves me with 6days, 5days actually max, to come out with something and to hopefully animate a trailer by then,
i got something to prove to my lecturer, that i actually do have wad it takes, that i really have to prove alot of pple wrong about me, alot of pple do expect to see me fail, but hell no, im not gonna give them the satisfaction of that,
ready, set, go.
byebye
Chris - Carls Junior
our virgin meal at Carls Junior,
insane people - me jon ant shimin and merv
loads of dirty jokes,while trying to finish the HUGE amount of food that they gave us,
we even had on the house stuff, cuz the staff messed up our order,
its the last time we are gonna hang out for a while, take care bros, (and girl)
its time we hardcore did our work le
Chris - LOVE
Love, everybody wants it, everybody searches high and low for it, everybody tries to convince themselves they have found it, and when they really do, its like finding great treasures for them. What is love? The phrase “I love you,” has to be like the most overused phrase of mankind. If there are 6 billion people in the world, it would have probably been said 6 billion times, in many languages or even twice that number, but how much of it is really meant from the heart? How much is actually true? From the sweet nothings whispered by lovers? To the whisper and a kiss from her mother to her children? From an infatuated young teenager to another, when they know less than half of what the word means?
Through the machinations of Hollywood, its movies, and in digital media, love has been cheapened, to something which you suddenly get, and should be consummated within the one hour of the show. But in reality, it’s a whole more complicated. Everyone searches for love, in the workplace, the bar, the disco, dating services, restaurants, schools, everyone wants it, but how many of these bunch has actually got it?
There was a hilarious argument about the theory that somewhere out there, there is your one true love, interesting complications were voiced, what happens if she got into an accident? What happens if she met someone else? Are we destined to spend life alone? I don’t think so.
My personal opinion, I could be wrong, but I couldn’t care, (Its called an opinion for a reason), I think love is meeting someone, finding out that that person makes it possible for your life to become so much more meaningful, and that love is a ongoing thing, its falling for a person, and knowing his/her flaws and horrendous habits but accepting for they person is. My take that is.
Chris - Kids
Excited gurgling, hysterical laughter, the nuclear reactor of energy that they all seem to be born with but which I have seem to have lost. I miss being a kid, carefree lives, where their only worry, is “where is my mommy and daddy?” At the mention of ice cream or Macdonald’s, and they would be instantly cheered up and with bright eyes and smiling faces. I wonder what always keeps them so happy? At 6 years old, they aren’t tainted by this world, they haven’t even know problems even if you tell them! How is their lives so happy at 6 years of age? While mine has been tormenting for 19 years?
When I look at them, at best, I have mixed feelings, they remind me a world so innocent, where their tongue is not dirt-ridden with vulgarities, where they had no scars, everything in the world is perfect for them, and possibly nothing can interest them for more than 2 minutes.
When I used to teach in Phillipines, as on a mission trip, we taught kids, who have possibly the worst life possible, some of them even work as prostitutes but they smile, how come they smile? They smile when they see us, and at least for 3 hours of lesion time they are not fighting the world out there, they don’t need to worry about hunger(because we brought snacks) and their hugs of goodbye were clenched tight with great reluctance, as if they never ever wanted to let us go.
Maybe its hope in those eyes, maybe the youngers ones aren’t as cynical as us, aren’t as jaded by life as we are, they all have a wellspring of hope that just bubbles, overflow, and just doesn’t seem to stop flowing. Sometimes I think I know it all, know how much life can throw at me, but I seem to forget something, and the kids always remind me of that, how life can be so simple, and so enjoyable as long as we look upon the world as a child again.
JoN - To someone
(This was supposedly a long entry before I fell asleep w/o posting. Unfortunately, dad used my computer and most likely had shut down without saving the older entry. Thus, this shall be kept simple and short.)
Whenever I visit a particular friend's blog (haha I sure hope u won't mind, ying-jie?), an animated gif at the end of her entries never fails to remind me of an unrequited love.
To creyhl:
Ever since that day, there didn't seem much for us to talk abt now these past few weeks. Although I did try once during c.law lecture, the natural command of speech between us was just simply taboo. I avoided you and dreaded going for lectures. It became a habit and it has to stop.
I don't know how you feel. You don't tell me much. You're always vivacious and jolly during lectures but ur msn nick tells me otherwise. ('though it's in chinese)
My feelings end with this full stop here.
I'm gonna stop my nonsense of avoidance =D it's time we caught up on each other as friends once again
Chris - Promises i had better keep
damn long time since i blogged,
anyway, im still drowning in FYP and creative writing, dun get me wrong, both things are fun, but its juz scary alll little time there is left, and the amount of things u want to do, maybe all i need is confidence, cuz if i can do it, i can, if i think i cant, i wont be able to for nuts.
after february 16, there is a ton of things i want to do and i will do it.
-revamp this blog, its gonna be in flash .period
-finish the long-overdue wakeboard website, blow them to bits with all it works
-finish the soundman t-shirt
-start freelancing, i need cash, plus a rep..
-cook more?
-hang out with my friends more
haha, thats round it..
cooking of pasta and lasagne was fun.. =D
//rmb wad i said bro, close one chapter, then start on the new one, books dun jump chapters.
//they took away our dustbin -.-
JoN - 32-bit
Crash course in pasta making shown in 400x336..
Phase 1.
- Chop the onions and garlic.
- Grate cheese
- Slice chikin breasts to heeuge chunks. Sausages too.
- Put the whole bag of fusilli to boil. Run, screaming, if the water boils out.
- Fry garlic and sausages. 4get the onions.
- Pour in the pasta sauce and sausages. Allow it to simmer.
- If sauce starts to dry up. Run downstairs for tomato puree
Phase 2.
- Eat up the sausages in the pretense of "food-tasting"
- It's now done
Phase 3.
JoN - sky's the limit. so are my actions
Consequences arise when one worships ignorance. It was something that never came across my mind. Not till some sense were knocked into me by a few good friends.
I share a similar family background with her. Thus, it somehow allows us to relate in each other much easier. Someone said I may be the only positive guide in her life given the vagueness of the people she hangs out with. However, was I really using someone as a replacement/stand-in over a love that I had failed to receive from another? I'll despise myself if I ever did. But that's wot I always tell myself..
Wot if I subconsciously did? The simple pleasure of being in her company that cld tantamount to a terrible hurt to both parties. It's plainly conceited and despicable to use her feelings as a cushion to soften the impact on the veracity of my own damned feelings.
I'm not gonna carry on this mistake. Love has to be nurtured. Not forced. Not put on fwd >>\ till it becomes a facade.
The sky's the limit. So are my actions.
Chris - FYP, cooking of lasagne, blah blah
Jon hatched this crazy idea of cooking lasagne and pasta!
great.. haha.. a crazy cooking event during my FYP, greatt... lol.. you better have something fun to do planned.. otherwise, im really working at cartel before that!
currrently at this time.. im blogging, in macdonalds, the new burgers are like pepper bombs for ya tongue, the minute you bite into the burger, ya taste buds are rendered useless.. couldnt taste ANYTHING at all after that..
been feeling rather good lately, i have no idea why.. but ah heck, i made a bet with myself, to finish my animation before ANYONE else and to render it in HD as well.. meaning 1280 by 1080
size! woot, its a gamble =D
gotta go..
JoN - discovery channel
oh man I'm so excited! I had discovered a tiny new strand of leg hair almost by accident while doing some stretching exercises for napha ystd haha. Junior here is approximately 3 mm and growing a couple of inches above my right ankle. Growing really well it'll say woo! Gonna name my new champ here, "yaki-udon"! Welcome my lil yaki to...erm.. ur extended family? This is ur aunty Brenda and her hubby Fred, that's ur cousin leffy and oh, (points to a crudely grown one above my kneecap) that's grandpa joe and then this is...
Make me proud son! *strokes yaki lovingly
ok fine it's disgusting. Shan't say any further =x
Dude! Ingredients for Sunday's pastaaaaaaaamania!
-Fusilli/spaghetti/linguine
-Tomato paste
-Meats (be creative)
-Olive oil?
-Garlic
-Chardonnay (I'm serious *hic =DD)
I'm not even sure if she really knows how to cook pasta. That gal said anything goes for her pasta and burst into laughter ystday when I asked. haha
JoN - Warning! Stong language content
- WARNING - - Strong language content- -
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.The fun factor is seriously lacking when i'm working w/o Ant & Chris (as usual).The lousy management put me as a bloody busser once again (a waste of resources, really). We, speaking on behalf of all full-time bussers, aren't merely mindless ceramic clearing machines capable of just THAT! Think better of us please..
Erwin is a useless prick for someone known as a manager. Stands ard looking all sweet and nice. (oh not to mention? IN THE DAMNED WAY!!) Wanna chat up gals? DO IT AT A PUB OR SOMETHING U GAF! Given that the tight squeeze from the bar to the kitchen called "space" is rather scarce... (erwin's mass makes it even wtf) HAVE THE COURTESY TO MOVE OUT OF THE WAY YOU MORON! PEOPLE ARE SERVING FOOD AND MOVING SOILED UTENSILS TO THE KITCHEN HELLO?! *snaps fingers
Airhead of 2007 very much goes to Erwin. I don't care if it's still too early.
Anyways, got to know a handful of colleagues who are still waiting for their O results these past 2 weeks. Rather nice peeps. Charlotte especially. I wldn't say she's drop dead gorgeous or anything but she's gentle in speech, has a brilliant smile and oh, you sld see the way she blush man... chop chop. It goes from pink to crimson in an instant haha.. The other gal I got to know was Sheila. Looks very much like Geanervy. Had only random moments in between lunch to talk to her b4 some thirsty hippo demands his/her glass to be filled with H2O.
More than half of the customers I entertained today were couples.. Still. My stand stays strong. Being SINGLE RWKS!
gamertags!
i offically made our gamertags part of the blog! lol.. once we start playing, then it show up,
bad news for all pple hoping to get the tv shows from me, my debit card is somehow weird with the website im using, every other website is fine, except for that one.. so i got so fed up thati used the cash on other things.. lol, now i get my xbox live up again,, and playing halo2 during the nights that my sis aint using the comp
back to FYP, i feel screwed currently, the modeling is not finished yet, and unless i pull off some kind of miracle, its gonna be still a little screwed currently.
played squash again with the church bunch, with the addition of
table tennis, and pool, i lost to rachel in table tennis, and to my dad in squash.. great..
anyway, note to self,
26 jan = Interium die die 90% muz be done
12 jan = Wakeboarding
14 jan cooking Lasagne
// gee, that hurt..
JoN - trivia trivia
Shucks man. It'd only been the 1st week of school and I'd been avoiding Cheryl so much.. She took the same bus as me today and damned, I was feeling so rigid and all. Weiye happened to be in the bus too and thus, I had some sought of accompaniment on my way to tax lecture. If not for him, I wld have broken out in a sprint. That's the reality of a rejection I guess.
If it goes well, you get a partner.
If it doesn't, then too bad.
Unfortunately for me, I lost a good friend too as a year end bonus -shrugs-
Well at least I got to know someone else new and I really enjoy hanging out with her. All my troubles and fresh heartbreaks seem to vanish when I'm in her company. I've got it planned out. Sakae sushi on fri, Delirious on sat and shimin's cooking pasta on sun. Pasta sia! Rmb the pasta we cooked ages ago for lunch on 1 of my stayovers Chris? The one with oxtail stew and dunno-what-sai thingy that tasted so revolting...
Sigh had a long talk with Chris over the phone late last night. Well spoke abt lotsa personal stuff on a rather Need-to-know basis.. Still missing those good ol' times when I was practically shorter than you dude! ahahz
Final Year Phglem
im sick.. ROWLLLLLL
stupid flu hit me today, im wiing my nose at least 2000 times a second, and my nose feels like a leaky tap with watery stuff juz "zoooooooooooooooup" down my nose. i wish i had eugene's talents of licking his nose, maybe i can use that skill in cleaning up my "happy flgem"
im now behind schedule! oh no, bad time.. tml need to chiong modelling le
sian..had a good talk with jon juz now..gave him tips from "Wongi's Soups for Dating 101"
if u crash and burn, you do NOT get ya money back.. lol..
sniff, SNARK, SNURF!
(thats the noses currently while writing this post, tag the board if u wan me to post an mp3 of it.. =D
//why do you look so sad?
2006 = byebye 2007 = hello
2006, man.. its a year of insane ups and downs, theres alot i gotta thank God for, plus alot of things that i did that year that im seriously not proud of,
i got hurt, i got rejected, i got scolded, i got jealous, i got insane, pretty much a long list
but
i got blessed, i got more friends, i got wiser in my work, i got my life back in order, i made amends and i tried reaching out,=D
Thank God for my sec school brother, jon, seriously man, life wouldnt be half as insane, or fun as it is without ya, bro. same class for 4 secondary years, getting d7 for the chinese olevels together, and loads of crazy stuff that we do, thanks man.. you were one of the beacons in my life. =D
thank God for Sook, Fishe and Ser, new friends found from the event that happened.
also that i got to bring my other Wong brother, Eugene to church, and that i got to know Maria more as a person,
anyone i missed for now, dun worry, you will always be mentioned in a post=D
hello 2007, what do you have in store this year?
JoN - reflections, resolutions, reasonings
It's abt time to reflect on my achievements and failures for the year 2006.. The repercussions of my rather immature behavior in the past (whether directly or indirectly) were consequential to the extent that it weakens the thin thread that holds my relationships with my friends and loved ones.. I don't know if u guys realize but I've begun to stammer really badly haha.. A by-product of a loss of self respect or confidence that is tampered further with the feeling of being "left-on-the-shelf-for-too-long". I'm obsolete. Period.
I was just wondering? Wld any of you guys out there still miss the old Johnny in that worn out cargo pants and shaggy blue SPCA polo T that was my unofficial poly skool uniform for the past 2 and a half years haha.. Change was a big thing. It was that BIG to me. If it wasn't for her, I wld still be wearing that crappy clothing for another decade or so. Well, I've moved on in life. If she isn't the one for me, then acceptance wld be another lesson in life for me. It's great to have friends who impart their experience and advice when ur in a dire situation that renders S.O.S imbar.. FUBAR man. To all my besties and affiliates, u guys had been my beacon of light in tides of darkness. Cheers.
Chris you know something. If you weren't in existence. Earth wld be a giant sphere of h2o and land wld be merely flotsam that only runs a few miles per square feet. It wld rain sticky tar and feathers on weekends, blue cheese and smelly toufu on weekdays and if luck permits, a light shower of terpantine on alternate days. THAT is how bad it wld be if i hadb't known u la.. Thus, i wld like to take this opportunity to apologize for any misgivings and thank you for being such a great buddy. =DD
And yes I've been seeing this rather outgoing girl named shimin.. -_-!! I won't deny anymore..
